Gender, Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation

To begin, I have a huge family. Often times the children and tweens in my family consider my home a safe haven. Needless to say, I always have children (covering all age ranges) over. One behavior that I have found myself correcting often is the children calling one another “fags” and or “gay.” I find them doing it every chance they get. If someone says something they feel is not masculine enough, they’re called “gay.” If someone shows emotions, like telling one another, “I love you before going to bed,” they’re called gay. I’m not sure where it has come from, if it’s something they do in school amongst their peers, but we have begun implementing consequences.

I have explained to the children that the terms they are using are offensive and should not be used because of the effects they can have on others. I try to have them understand how it feels to hear offensive terms used towards them. They often tell me that they are not meaning to be offensive and that they are playing around. For me though, it is important that they understand that their words will not always be taken lightly by people that are offended by them. I want them to understand the importance of respecting everyone at all times. Both in private and in public.